Monday, April 4, 2016

Loss

On March 27th, Easter Sunday, a dear family member passed away. He left behind so many people who love him, including a wife and young children. I have lost family members before, but I was either so young or so distant from the situation that although it hurt, it did not seem devastating. As a young girl, I remember thinking I would never stop crying over my grandfather's passing, that I would live my life dedicated to his memory as everybody else slowly forgot and returned to normal life.
I do not think this now, obviously.
My cousin is a distant family member that I never had the opportunity to know well, but I was still able to realize the impact of this. I was able to realize what death means to those left behind. To my father, who lost his best friend. To his wife and his children, left alone. To his sisters, his cousins, his aunts, his father, his friends.
Nobody can say that it's fair for this man to pass.
But ultimately, it's not up to us to decide who stays and who goes.
I'm not going to write a bunch of comforting statements. When I see things like "Heaven needed another angel" my first instinct is to call it out as crap.These may be legitimate statements and I do think provide some comfort to some people, but I don't want to trivialize what death means to those of us left desolate behind.
Instead, I am suggesting that we learn to make loss a powerful spiritual experience. Whatever spiritual means to you. To me this experience has meant learning to surrender my own will to the almighty. It means learning that sometimes things happen that are unjust and unfair in our lenses but perfect in an eternal lens.



If any of you wish to help his family, please comment or email me at megiris@aol.com, or donate here: https://www.gofundme.com/3hf8jud8  They would appreciate support during this time. <3